What I Want VS. What God Wants

June 02, 2016 exactly 12 a.m in the morning it was announced in Manila X Festival’s site that I won 2 tickets. Obviously, I was so surprise and glad. Before June 02, 2016 around last week of May, I really prayed and did an action to win in that contest because, I really wanted to be there and witness the first ever Manila X Festival. And most of all, I want to see my favorite artist and bands there like Yeng Constantino, Up Dharma Down and The Juans. hehehe. So, I don’t want to miss that opportunity. But, to make the long story short, I couldn’t make it. (Right now, I’m very sure the concert is on going. lol.) Last night, after my night class, I went to church for worker’s meeting. And then, my mentor already knew it that I will not be able to attend CYOD even if I didn’t tell her earlier so one of my ka-mentee teased me hahaha. Plus, travelling back at home my disciple PM’ed me. She told me that she will attend CYOD. So, I am more confused If I’m still going on Manila X Festival or will attend CYOD. Huhuhu. I talked to GOD. And praying for a wisdom. Because, that moment I don’t feel a sense of “peace” to go in that concert. Although, that’s once in a lifetime. Yes, honestly, I don’t want to miss the opportunity to see my fav’s. But, it will break my heart if I miss the opportunity to meet my disciples.

June 04, 2016, 9 a.m in the morning it was all set. I’m very prepared and excited for the concert but still my heart is not at peace. After a few hours, my best friend called me that she can’t make it today. I felt sad about her news. So, I texted my other friends and one of my friend is willing to be with me. But then, I decided not to go anymore. So, I already told my mama & my mentor that I won’t go on Manila X Festival. My mama told me that maybe “it is God’s will”. And my mentor told me that “God has His ways.” In any decision we have the opportunity to choose. And this is one of the opportunity to practice wisdom. There is a purpose behind everything. I am so busy planning for the concert not even asking God’s opinion about it. Now, I learn to lean. I learn to ask and seek. I learn to be more obedient [obedience out of love]. I learn that my God is so powerful enough to do and fulfill EVERYTHING in EVERY WAY. I want Him to direct my path even when I’m about to make choices in life. So, yeah, I was about to take a bath a while ago when GOD spoke to me, I just cried.. To be honest, I want to be in Manila X Festival but, I want to obey and submit to God [out of love]. I should be serious about following God’s will, and I have to recognize that it’s not about getting what I want, but what God asks. His will is what’s best for me. 2PM, me and my ka-meente went to te amo and 4PM, I attended CYOD. I’m telling you, “It’s worth it!”. Worth it to choose HIM first and put GOD above all else.

18 Years of Existence

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It’s already 12:00 in the morning, February 27, 2016.

I officially turned 18 years old. Hello legal age!

Happy 18th birthday to me! Praise God for another chapter of my life!

Of course, it will be a long day ahead of me. I have no idea what will happen later. No plans at all. But, I just give it all to God.

My 18 years of existence is such a great life! Especially, when I started to have an intimacy relationship with Christ, life with Him is truly the best. Though there a lot of failures, mistakes, pains, difficulties and hardships, it is all the ones that make me to keep going. I keep trying harder and keep making things in proper order to rebuild things rightly. But then, it’s not by might, nor by power, but by His Spirit. I may not be perfect but His grace is more than enough.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. (2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV)

18 years of existence, full of ups and downs and lessons and twists and turns and happiness! Truly, I will be forever grateful to our God, to my family, relatives, mentor, leaders, friends, churchmates, of course for without them I won’t be who exactly am today. I love you all.

I’m super blessed, grateful and happy to have experienced another year and looking forward to what’s coming up.

Proverbs 9:11 • Lord, no word could describe how thankful I am for everything You’ve done in my life.

XO,

Sheim

My Roller Coaster 2015

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365/365. This is the last day of 2015. So before 2015 ends, I decided to share some experiences,  tell you what has been happening in my life. And share the things that excite me. I just want to share this verse, readers! Deut. 31:6, masasabi kong parang roller coaster talaga ang 2015 ko, masyado ng gasgas ang quotation na “Ang buhay ay parang roller coaster, may ups and downs. ” Pero yun naman talaga yun eh may ups, downs, screams, laughs. Pero, sa lahat ng yon, Deut. 31:6 ang pangako ng Diyos na aking pinanghawakan sa buong taon.

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you. (Deuteronomy 31:6, ESV)

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For the last couple of months, I have been in transition. Okay tapos hindi, okay tapos hindi okay. Tataas sabay bababa, tataas sabay bababa. Pero sa lahat ng yon, dun ako mas lalong naging matatag, dun ko mas lalong nakilala yung sarili ko, dun mas lumabas yung tunay na ako, dun ako mas na transform, and it’s all because of His unending grace in my life. Too many to mention sa mga nangyare sakin, sa mga natutunan, sa mga big events sa buhay ko, lalo na’t pagdating sa school. Looking back on 2015, being a president of Junior Philippine Computer Society – AMA Biñan Local Chapter is one of the longest and hardest journey in my life. The rest of the time, I have to deal with people issues. You really have to be strong and courageous to handle everything, in terms of physical and emotional area. In all my year of leadership and representing JPCS, I can hardly recall a time when I was not dealing with an issue as such.  Some people issues are small, some are big, and some are unbearably painful. But, as I grew, I was able to handle those issues by the help of our God. Because of God’s wisdom in my life, I was able to manage all those issues, as long as I know my identity in Christ. Maybe, If I am not careful and was not able to manage, it can keep me up at night, and send me into bouts of depression, discourage and anxious.  Why?  Because understanding, inspiring, organizing, aligning, and keeping a group of people focused and passionate is simply difficult. Also, I always have to remind myself that I don’t have to please people. Being a leader can be a rewarding experience but it also means facing a host of anticipated and unexpected challenges.

Dumating din sa point na kailangan kong ayusin yung mga priorities ko sa buhay. The most challenging year as well. Struggle sa scholar, struggle sa pagpapataas ng grades, struggle na lang sa lahat. But then, I always have to remind myself ano nga ba talaga ang first priority ko? It is then that I should play my role as a wise, focused, and resolute servant of God. Time management is very important as well. Yan naman yung taon-taon na gusto kong iimprove sa sarili ko kung paano ko mamanage ang time ko.

Sa buong 2015 ko, alam ko si Lord ang aking kasama. Kaya nagagawa ko ang lahat ng ito. Sa lahat ng scars, hurts, pains, burdens, brokenness, sadness, I still thank God for everthing dahil walang panahon na pinabayaan Niya ko. Wala kong maisip na oras na iniwan Niya ko sa panahon na walang wala ako, sa panahon na down na down ako. Though, I feel tired and my breathlessness is still there in the wings, I have rested as much as I can so that I can try and fight this journey that little bit more. I’d say 2015 has been an incredibly tough year, It’s certainly been one of my most difficult, confusing years I’ve triumphed thus far & I know I’m not the only one in that boat. Right? But then, this scars reminds me how good and how faithful the Lord is. Sa pagtatapos ng taon ko, akala ko okay na, tapos na, akala ko magiging smooth na lahat, pero hindi pala. Isa sa mga painful experience ko yung pagtatapos ng taon (Too private). Pero kahit ganun pa man, dun mo pa din talaga makikita kung gaano kabuti ang Diyos sa buhay ko. Kahit na naranasan ko yun and I know everyone of us will experience that o yung iba na experience na, lahat naman tayo pagdadaanan yung sakit na ganun, always remind yourself : “Deuteronomy 31:6” Alalahin lang natin lahat ng pangako ng Diyos. God is so faithful. God is so good. God is so gracious. God is so awesome!

I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. (Psalms 16:8)

After all, I think we are only just at the beginning of a very long and unknown journey. And as they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!

So this was 2015 and it was fully packed and intense but in the end it was lacking far behind a lot of my personal goals and hopes, it’s good to be on a longer time out to find time to think about it again and make 2016 a bigger, better year and prove that mistakes can be made as long as you learned the lesson and adjust.

I have seen many failures throughout the year by myself but still God’s mercy and grace still remains. I thank God for having my family, church mates, mentor, disciple, and friends which I am tremendously, incredibly thankful. Thank you sa mga nag-stay. Thank you sa mga naging parte ng 2015 ko at sa mga susunod pang taon. Thank you sa mga nandiyan parati.Hindi ko na kayo iisa-isahin. Maraming salamat sa inyo!

There are many things in life to be thankful for.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28, NIV)

Marami pa rin ang mga blessings na dapat ipagpasalamat sa Diyos. Sobrang dami. Sobrang dami at sobrang dami. Una na sa lahat diyan ay ang makasama yung family ko magsimba tuwing Linggo. Kung meron man akong sobrang ipagpapasalamat sa Diyos yun ay yung blinessed ako ng family na ganto. A big shoutout to my family for standing by my side through this whole year. For my family who held my hand and said, “You got this!” in the times I was so close to giving up. My family who’s always there for me. Thank you, for an open ears to all my never-ending rants, for all the dramas, for all the kwentos and laughs. For my family who really cheered on me and supported me all through out the year, thank you so much and i love you.

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After all, It’s a “BLESSED 2015”, looking back at the past 12 months, it has really been such a blast. This year has been one full of surprises. God gave me more than I expected and more than I think I’ll ever need. Thank You for all the answered prayers, Lord. As much as I want to repeat 2015, all I can do now is look and move forward to the new year. I can’t wait to see what’s in store for me!

This year, I started writing the things that I want to achieve within this year and I am glad that most of those that I’ve written were already crossed out. Super excited na ko ngayong taon. Since, this 2016 mag dedebut na ko. Wuhooo! I’m turning 18 on February 27, 2016. *Oops!*. Excited na ko sa mga gagawin pa ni Lord sa buhay ko. Since, isa pa sa mga unforgettable experience ko ang maranasan ang Fire Camp nung Dec. 27, 28 & 29 kelan lang siya, so eto ako on fire na on fire. Wuhooo! And praying na mamaintain na to, ggang matapos ang taong 2016.

Making goals is one of my favorite things to do. I love having a plan, something to work towards.

Let’s make goals this year:
1) Share the Gospel to at least one person each month & build a cell group on my campus and on LNC as well, ask for they’re commitment towards the gift of eternal life the Lord Jesus offers.
2) Consistent spiritual discipline – quiet time in the morning (prayer, devotion, bible-reading, and quiet time/listening to God) and praying unceasingly as each moment goes.
3) Being productive and excellent on Digisciple (Ministry). To learn more and improve my commitment as well.
4) Encourage others through God’s Word as the Holy Spirit leads. Include prayer, too, and best done together if you can.
5) Use my planner every day I would really like 2016 to be a year of staying organized and on track. Checking on the short-term and long-term goal and make it happen as well.

Hoping to learn more in 2016 and a more productive year ahead of me and of you, too. Yow, Happy New Year!

It is always my goal to make the next year even better than the previous. I’m very excited to see what surprises God has in store for me this year! yay! 2016, I’m sure you will be amazing!

I’m so excited to embrace 2016. Not just with New Year Resolutions but, with an openness to receive more visions & goals coming from the Lord.

Another year of success and happiness has passed. With every new year, comes greater challenges and obstacles in life.

Thank God for everything that happened this year. There may be bad times but there’s always good times.

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My Faith Journey (3rd Trimester-Final Examination)

Did I truly trust God, the God I had claimed to know and love all my life? And if so, would I follow Him even into the darkest, most painful valley?

By His grace, I have followed.  By my faith, miracles happen! And truly God has given me eyes that see Him in the most unexpected ways. The only thing that will keep u going is your FAITH~

FAITH SEEING AS GOD SEES.. – Ptra. Mitch Gustilo, Fueled by Faith Series

Faith does not operate in the realm of the possible. There is no glory for God in that which is humanly possible. Faith begins where man’s power ends. I have experienced the power of such faith in my life.

One of the struggles I was facing when I started to enter college was finances; It so heavy for our parents to provide our tuition fees. Especially two of us are studying in a expensive computer college school.

My brother is a graduating student (I mean, 1 tri to go!) So I have to make a savings for my own payment. Especially, when you see your parents are working hard just to give you an education for your future. I’m really willing to help them when I started to realize how expensive our tuition fee is.

I think it’ll be a big help for them if I make a savings for my finals and also if I would be thrifty whenever they give me an allowance. And because of that routine every examination (ipon dito, ipon don, tipid dito tipid don), it grew me a lot. But, still my parents are the one who provides my monthly payment in school. I just help them with my very best and with my very willing soul by giving some of my savings in order to add in my examination fee. Sometimes, I was thinking to be a self-supporting student. Look for a part time jobs, in order to pay off my tuition fees and living expenses.

Final exam is heading off.. My balance in school is still bigger. In my mind, I want to provide my final exam on my own because I don’t wan’t my parents to be so stressed. Me and my brother, we’re both studying at expensive school, so I have to take an action for my exam. So past few days, I suffered physically. My health condition worsened; every time I’m going to sleep, it feels like my intestine, my liver, my respiratory system are jumping around my bed. Sounds weird right? because of stress and lack of sleep. I still remember several times when I cried out to God to let me sleep for 3 days because the pain was so unbearable. Every time I was thinking for my final exam, I always asks myself, “Bakit ganto? Masipag naman ako mag-aral. Yung ibang hindi naman ganoonan kasipagan, pero fully paid agad. Eh ako?” Am I starting to doubt? But when all those questions starting to pop in my mind, I started to read Owner’s Manual. And pray! Asking God to take away all those doubts, all those fears and worries. And praying that may the spirit of fear leave me that moment.

Weeks had passed.. Finals is coming..

Habang palapit na ng palapit yung araw, ang hirap na iwasan yung pressure. Pero instead of spearheaded of worries, I JUST PUT MY TRUST ON THE LORD. This is what I always says, every time I have trouble in AMA or everytime I have concerns in AMA > “Eh, si Lord is by my side!  Nilagay ako ni Lord sa school na to! I’m 101% sure na hinding hindi Niya ko papabayan. Hindi pababayaan in terms of people around me, in terms of environment there, in terms of grades, and most of all in terms of financial (as we all know, tuition fee in AMA is so expensive KAYA: PARA SA MGA NAGAARAL SA AMA, MAG-ARAL KAYO NG MABUTI. DAHIL ANG MAHAL MAHAL NG TUITION FEE SA AMA! HINDI NAGTATAE ANG MGA MAGULANG NATIN. BLESSED TAYO DAHIL PINAGARAL TAYO NG MGA MAGULANG NATIN SA MAHAL NA UNIBERSIDAD). GOD IS WITH ME. Selah.

When I got home, I told mom and dad that the deadline for the finals was the wednesday because I don’t want to be hassle to fix my clearance and my RSA, and I found out that we didn’t have any money to pay for it yet. Normally, I’d feel frustrated, irritated, pressure, cranky and nervous all at the same time, but I was surprised I wasn’t. It was amazing. I just felt so much peace, so much hope, and so much assurance that God was gonna provide for me. That I was gonna be able to take exam.

*****

It’s not a faith unless you made a bold declaration. – Ptra. Mitch Gustilo, Fueled by Faith Series

God has already been providing in miraculous ways for me to complete my studies. Despite many trails, God has provided for all my needs and tuition fees over the 9 months. And now I am moving forward on the next level. Two steps to go. I can now see the finish line, and I am fervently praying to graduate on time with LAUDE~

Neither my desperate needs nor higher grades made any difference. However, my faith did not waver. I reasoned to myself that God was testing me so that my faith could be strengthened in the midst of trials. Just like Job says, “ ‘But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold’ ” (Job 23:10).*

Job! What kind of worse experience was he going through that led him to make such an affirmation? Job was a God-fearing follower; he obeyed God and trusted Him.

Despite all these terrible and heartbreaking trials, Job still believed in the Lord, for God was the object of Job’s faith. Our belief affects our attitude and our reaction. What do I mean? Look at the attitude and reaction Job had while facing all these problems. Job’s faith, trust, and belief were all rooted firmly in God. Job would have been so hopeless if his faith was based on everything he possessed. That was not the case.

His faith was in God, and God never disappears. So, when everything was lost, Job had one assurance that can never be lost and he exclaimed, “My Redeemer lives.” In that Living God, Job trusted, so he survived every crisis. He did not lose hope because he based his faith in the Lord God was the object of his faith.

*****

God provides it all the way

Going back to my own story, despite of my trials and struggles, I kept praying to God and believing in Him. I was praying for God to open a way for me to take final exam if it was really His will. I also prayed that He would help me pay off all my expenses, tuition fees, and provide me a place to stay.

Finally, a while ago, GOD PROVIDES! Imagine, my final examination starts today (April 16, 2015) and this is the day I also got my permit. GOD REALLY STRETCHES MY FAITH IN FINANCES *My Nga-nga Moment!* Slap me? Am I dreaming? I keep telling my 2 classmates “NA TALAGA BANG MAGEEXAM NA KO? TOTOO NA BA TO? KAKAPRAY KO LANG NG KAKAPRAY, NGAYONG MAKAKAEXAM NA KO? DAHIL SA MGA BIBIG NA KAKAPRAY NA KAKAPRAY AT NADINIG NI LORD?”

In the end, I was able to take my exam.

Here it is :

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Tendeden! I’m excited for my exam (for the very first time) hahaha, because I know I went through ups and downs before getting this permit. Actually, every exam, I am very early to buy a green booklet (one week before the exam) even though I’m still not paid yet. Because, I always tell to my mom that- “Ma, ito yung faith ko. BY FAITH. Alam ko kasing makakaexam ako kaya nabili agad ako ng green booklet. Si laging by faith ako ♥” hehehe.

God is so amazing and great. *AKO ANG SAKSI*

It was all God’s doing. I always reminded myself that “we live not by sight, but by faith.” Though I did not have enough money to study. I believed God and His promises in the Bible. “ALAM KONG SASAGIPIN AT SASAGIPIN AT SASAGIPIN NIYA PA KONG MULI, JUST LIKE WHAT I’VE SAID, GOD PLACE ME IN THAT CAMPUS (AMA) IMPOSIBLENG PABAYAAN NIYA KO”. My faith was in God. I believed His Word, “ ‘You have made the heavens and the earth by your great power . . . nothing is too hard for you’ ” (Jer. 32:17). I know that everything on earth belongs to the Lord, and if it’s His will and keep on desiring, then He will hear my prayer just like 1 John 5:14 says, “This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us” (NASB).

We receive Jesus and His blessings only by faith. – Ptra. Mitch Gustilo, Fueled by Faith Series

Whatever situation you are in, the word of the Lord is to put your faith in Him. Listen and focus to His words no matter how loud and seemingly true the other voice is.

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“Faith is to believe what we do not see, and the reward of faith is to see what we believe.” – St. Augustine

The important lessons I learned from my walk with God, my faith journey include: to trust and have faith in Him, believe in His Word, and claim His promises because our God loves us so much that He will always carry us through. T

here might be times when we pray and pray and nothing happens. We just have to wait patiently. God stretches our faith. We might have lost faith in God because of various situations. However, we must never lose heart, never give up hope. Always trust in God.

Random Writings

“If you ask me how I am doing, I would say I am doing just fine…”

-Not over you. 

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For I want my heart to rest until wounds heal…

I have decided to completely forget. I made up my mind that your name would be forbidden words to utter. Every time I’ll see a thing that reminds me of you, I’ll just close my eyes.  I have decided to take a leap and move on. To delete everything about the false memories I have hidden. I take away all the memories. To see you in a light how others look at you. And not to think the way I think about you. I made up my mind to let go of the view I have for you within. I decided to put a period. Move forward. And leave everything to the Lord.

I believed the promises you said. Believed in dreams of my own imagination. Believed in things that would never happen in reality.  Believed in nothing. Because I was drown in false meaning of love you defined for me. I would have left the ocean for you even you took everything away and just gave me little self-respect.

I never thought a person’s mind could think of someone over and over again. Only so real to miss that people and to cry for a hope that even just for a second, I could forget everything about you.

P.S: Random thoughts only. 11:11PM

Thankful for 2014: Thank You, Jesus. (INSPIRED)

I was about to scroll my account. Wala scroll scroll lang sa facebook, twitter, news, tumblr etc. For sure kasi madaming mga New Year’s Resolution, & New Year’s Realization ang mga mababasa ko. Kanyang kanyang post. Kanya-kanyang pasasalamat sa mga naging part ng kanilang 2014. Fresh start. Everyone was positive that 2015 will be a great year!

So here’s the TOP 3 post na nakaagaw ng pansin ko. Nakaka-amaze! I was blessed by they’re post. Isa silang artist/singer/song-writer/musician. They perform in front of audiences but also knows how to worship God. IS IT AMAZING?

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1. Yeng Constantino

Actually last last year post pa ito, January 21, 2012. Pero habang nagiiscroll ako ng mga post ni Yeng on the mission hehe, I found this one! Isa si Yeng sa mga favorite artist ko. Hindi lang sa dahil magaling siya kumanta at magcompose ng kanta kundi dahil sa sobrang passionate niya rin to serve Jesus. And dahil dun habang nagbabasa ako ng mga posts at blogs niya nag-struck sakin tong mga words na to. I find this awesome! & Very powerful talaga! as in! “SURRENDER EVERYTHING TO GOD”.  Sa tingin ko kasi ngayong magbabagong taon, heto ang pinakamagandang bagay na gawin natin. Yung masurrender natin at malet’go natin lahat lahat kay Lord. Yung sins, doubts, frustrations, burdens, fear, disappointments, failures, guilt and shame. It would be the best fresh start for all of us. “LEAVE EVERYTHING TO GOD”. Kung ayaw natin maging mabigat ang ating 2015. From the smallest things to the biggest things. Let God hold your world.

2. Gary Valenciano

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Gary V. is also known as Mr. Pure Energy. Nakikinig ako paminsan minsan ng mga kanta ni Gary V. at very inspirational ng mga Christian Music na kinompose niya. Kaya naman nakaamaze na napakasikat niya sa ating industriya pero still, nandun yung pagiging proud niya kung sino ang Diyos sa buhay niya. I saw this twitter post last last month. I think October ata yun. Nakakainspired di ba? Yung prayer na ganyan. Nakakaencourage! to pray for the wisdom and discernment. This coming 2015, nawa’ mas lalo pang tumindi ang mga prayer life natin. Before this year ends, wag nating kalimutang magdasal kay Lord. And let’s expect more great things from above. Asking is the rule of kingdom. Prepare na natin ang mga big prayer requests natin. Thank you, Jesus. “MORE PRAYER, MORE POWER!”

3. Zildjian Benitez

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I just wanted to share that I had a WICKED year this 2014! There may be failures, downs or discouragements I had this year but it didn’t made me give up as a musician or a person. This is all for the glory of God. Let His kingdom come and will be done this coming 2015  Have a Happy New Year everyone! – Zildjian Benitez

Ang pinakalast, si Zildjian Benitez. Ang iba sa inyo kilala siya, ang iba naman hindi. Isa siyang musician at the same time, nakanta rin. Isa siyang anak ng Pastor. Member siya ng G2B Boys, kung napanuod niyong ‘Got to believe in magic’ at naabutan niyo yung ‘Ikaw na na na’, siya yung nag-gitara dun. Member din siya ng bandang 4 of spades. Ayon, ayon lamang ang alam ko sakanya. Sikat na siya pero sapat lang hindi ganoon compare dun sa dalawang una. 16 or 17 years old na siya, mga ganoon. At the very young age, nagseserve na siya kay Lord. Basta ang alam ko, he serve Jesus through music. Amazing! December 31, 2014. After kong mag’devotion kaninang umaga, nagiiscroll ako ng news feed sa facebook at ito ang unang unang nabasa ko. As ing- una! hahaha Salubong! Habang binabasa ko to, napaisip ako ‘I feel him’ Hahahah. Ganto rin kasi yung gusto kong ishare ngayong patapos na ang 2014. I HAVE SO MANY MANY MANY FAILURES! I have nothing to be ashamed of. Lahat naman siguro tayo naranasan mag-fail at mag-fall. Paano matututo kung hindi dadaan sa failures, right? Walang exempted! Pero gustung gusto ko sa lyrics ng ‘From the inside out (Everlasting) by Hillsong’ yung A thousand times I’ve failed. Still your mercy remains.” Favorite line. At Favorite na favorite kong sabihin yan every time I failed. I believe that the love that God has for me extends to the heavens. His plans for me are not limited by my failures and mistakes. His grace is sufficient or enough to lift me from this state, and take me to where He wants me to be. I am surrendering to my Lord’s ability and wisdom to get me through this. I quit desperately trying to work everything out on my own. Minsan aasar asarin ka ni satan na, ‘uhhh, uhhh Loser belat! Failure!’ Pero I realized yung mga ganoon di dapat pinakikinggan yon. “JESUS DIED FOR ME!” Yun lang sapat na. Sapat na si Jesus ❤! Kaya sa mga nagui-guilty diyan this 2014 sa mga failures at mistakes nila. God is a forgiving God. It’s time for all of us to repent sa mga kasalanang nagawa natin. Leave your past behind you, and start over. It’s hard to resist the chance at a new beginning. A new way of living and looking at the world. Letting go of old habits, old memories. What’s important is that we never stop believing we can have a new beginning. It’s all because of Jesus who gave His life and love for us. But it’s also important to remember that amid all the crap are a few things really worth holding on to. Failure is inevitable, unavoidable but failure should never get the last word. You have to hold on to what you want. You have to not take no for an answer and take what’s coming to you. Never give in, never give up. Stand up. STAND UP AND TAKE IT! Thanks for inspiring zild! keep fighting for Jesus.

Change… We don’t like it, we fear it. But we can’t stop it from coming. We either adapt to change, or we get left behind. It hurts to grow. Anybody who tells you it doesn’t, is lying. But here’s the truth: Sometimes, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Make a change!

Sobrang amazing lang talaga na makakita ng isang artist/musician na hindi lang basta basta nagpeperform in front of audiences pero yung merong Diyos sa puso nila. Yung tipong kahit sikat sila at madaming umiidulo sakanila still, THEY BRING BACK ALL THE PRAISES AND GLORY TO OUR GOD! Taong hindi nahihiya na ipakita sa lahat ng tao na Mahal nila si God. Sobra lang. Naguumapaw. Yung feeling na ginagawa nila to kasi di na nila ma-contain ang happiness at revelation ni God but hindi nila alam na madaming naiinspire at nacu-curious din kay God at sila ay nagiging instrumento. Sobrang amazing! This coming 2015, Una (Yeng), Surrender everything to God [Bigay mo na lahat lahat kay Lord, wala dapat ititira]. Pangalawa (Gary V.), Be prayerful [Be thankful to Jesus for 365 blessed days]. Pangatlo (Zild), Confess everything to God. “Wag mong kakalimutan that God is a forgiving God. “HIS GRACE AND MERCY ENDURETH FOREVER” (Psalms 100:5).

Even if you’re tired, even if you want to walk away. You don’t. Because you are a pioneer. But nobody ever said it’d be easy.

Grace be with you all,

Sheim 🌙

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Tanggap ko na pero, Ang sakit pa din!

May mga bagay na kahit tanggap mo na, di mo parin mapipigilang masaktan pag naalala mo ulit. Yung pag naaalala mo ulit, maiinis ka, mapapasigaw ka, matutulala ka, mapapakiss ka sa dingding, mapapasplit ka, mapapaumpog yung ulo mo, mapapa’ouch ka, at masasaktan ka talaga.

Pero kahit ano namang drama ang gawin mo, kahit anong pagmumukmok mo, wala na. Hindi mo na mababalik yung oras. Ang kailangan mo na lang gawin ay tanggapin ng tuluyan at ibaon na ito sa lupa. May mga panahon talaga sa buhay natin na kailangan nating tanggapin.

Pero bat’ ang sakit sakit pa din?

Apat na bagay na tanggap ko na pero ang sakit sakit pa din sa tuwing naaalala.

1. HINDI AKO NAKASAMA NG FIRE CAMP

Last month pa inannounce na merong fire camp (youth camp) sa darating na December 28-30. Syempre ang nasa isip ko naman “ay matagal pa naman yun” di muna ako papaalam. Mahaba pa yung panahon kaya sa december na ko magpapaalam. Makakapaghanda pa naman siguro ako non. Nakalipas ang mga ilang araw.. teden! Hala december 25 na, hala december 26 na, hala december 27 na, ay bukas na yun! Hanggang sa ako na mismo yung nagdecide na di na ko makakasama. Aside sa wala akong pambayad. Late na ko nakapagpaalam. Paniguradong di ako papayagan nun lalo na’t kagagling ko lang sa outing at sunud-sunod na pag-alis sa bahay tapos alis ulit, di talaga na ko mapapayagan nun. Sad. Hanggang sa naging december 28, tuluyan na kong di nakapunta ng camp. Nag uumpisa na ang ‘Inggit Factor’ ayoko siyang maramdaman pero yon ang naramdaman ko after the service. Pakiramdam na ‘sana pala nagpaalam ako ng maaga’ Lalo na’t inaasar asar pa ko ng mga minions na ‘de wala wala wag niyo pansinin yan di yan sasama’ Naguiguilty tuloy ako na di ko ginawa yung best ko para makasama. Till’ now nandun pa din yung panghihinayang, Sad.

2. PADALOS-DALOS NA DESISYON

“Ang taong marunong ay makikinig at kukuha ng higit pang turo,” sabi ni Solomon, hari ng sinaunang Israel. Kung minsan, ang karamihan sa atin ay nakagagawa ng di-matatalinong pasiya dahil lamang sa hindi tayo nakinig sa payo ng iba.” — Kawikaan 1:5.

Lahat naman ng bagay pinagdidisyunan, maliit man ito o malaki. Kahit itong pagbasa mo sa post na to, nag desisyon ka rin bago mo to basahin. Hindi mo lang pansin. Ang dali mong mapag-decide no? Isa ata ako dun sa madaling magdesisyon. May mga panahon na padalos dalos akong madesisyon, minsan naman pinagiisipan ko din ito ng mabuti. Pero nararapat na pagisipan muna ang lahat lalo na kung involved ang puso sa pagdedesisyon. Sabi nga nila, ang padalos dalos na desisyon ay minsan nauuwi sa kapahamakan. At malinaw din na sinabi ng Bibliya na: “Ang padalus-dalos ay tiyak na patungo sa kakapusan.”

May mga desisyon na nagdudulot ng mabibigat na kahihinatnan. Samakatuwid, sikaping tiyakin nang patiuna kung ano ang magiging mga kahihinatnan nito. Mag-ingat na hindi ka mabulag sa posibleng di-kanais-nais na pangmatagalang mga resulta dahil sa panandaliang mga pakinabang. “Matalino ang nakakakita ng kapahamakan at nagkukubli, ngunit ang mga walang-karanasan ay dumaraan at daranas ng kaparusahan,” ang babala ng Kawikaan 22:3.

Itong taon na ito (2014), may mga naging desisyon akong padalos dalos. Gusto ko man i-share dito ang mga pagkakataon na iyon pero mas pipiliin ko na lang na i-private iyon. Ang importante sa dulo, Natuto! Lahat naman siguro tayo ay mga momentong ganto. Sa huli, tanggap na natin pero ang sakit sakit pa din. Gawa ng mga consequences na natanggap natin dahil sa padalos-dalos na padedesisyon. Sad. Pero, salamat sa Panginoon, because, “HE’S MERCY AND GRACE STILL REMAINS”

3. NAWALAN AKO NG WALLET

Isa to sa napakasakit na pagkakataon sa isang tao ang MAWALAN ka. Lalo na kung napakahalagang bagay sa’yo nito. Para sa akin, napakahalaga ng wallet, hindi lang dahil sa dito mo nilalagay ang pera mo, ang allowance mo, picture mo (hahahaha), pero sa kadahilanan na ding nandun ang mga ‘remembrances’ na meron ako. I think last last month ata ako nawalan ng wallet. Magkasunod na week ako nawalan. Yung unang wallet na nawala sakin, napakahalaga. Nandun yung mga tickets na inattendan ko, yung gospel card/invitation na unang invite sakin sa CYOD, may lamang P300.00, pictures o remembrance sakin ng mga taong malalapit sakin puso, may cards, ID’s simula nung kinder ako, may mga abububot halo halo. Everyday naiisip ko pa din nawala yung wallet ko, nasasaktan pa din ako. huhuhuhuu. Pero kahit anung ungol ko di na naman yon mababalik. Sad.

4. WALA AKONG NADATNAN SA NUVALI

Ang pinakalast. Dahil pinakalast at recently lang siya. Medyo ouchie pa siya. Fresh na fresh! Tanggap ko na pero sakit pa din. December 22, 2014, pumunta akong nuvali with Bea Samapang, Yap Madronero & Sr. Melchor Ortaleza. Ayon excited na ko. December 21, 2014 pumunta dito si yap pinaalam na ko haha kahit ako yung nagyaya sa kanila. Hanggang sa napayagan na ko. 6PM start nung event hanggang 10PM. So December 22, heto na siya. Maaga pa lang nagdevotion na ko. Imagine isa sa mga 7 big prayer requests ko, masasagot yung isa sa araw na iyon. Kaya excited na excited na ko. Hanggang sa 4:00PM nagprepare na ko. 6:00PM umalis na kami. Byumahe. Kinakabahan ako at the same time, excited na. Yey! Pagdating ayun nakita ko na ay di pala *napasigaw pa ko* wooo! kinakabahan na ko kasi parang wala naman. Baka manghinayang lang ako. Kaya antay pa kami ng ilang oras. Hanggang sa nagdesisyon na kaming umalis na at pumuntang paseo. Naibuhos na lang sa pagkaen. Pero okay lang nagenjoy naman akong nakasama sila. *Sorry, medyo blured.*

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Pero syempre wala naman dapat ituro sa lahat ng ito kung ang sarili mo mismo.

1. Kung nagpaalam sana ako ng maaga at pinagdasal ko ng sobra sobra makakasama sana kong fire camp.

2. Kung pinagisipan ko muna sana ng mabuti.

3. Kung pinaginagatan ko yung wallet ko.

4. Kung inalam ko muna kung may madadatnan ako dun o wala.

Tanggap ko na pero ang sakit sakit pa din! Hehe.

Weekly Post: Chapter 3 (The lost and found)

WEEKLY POST(6)The story of my life has many chapters. One bad chapter doesn’t mean it’s the end of the book.

Sa dami dami dami dami dami dami ng tao dito sa mundo paano ko mahahanap ang nawawala kong wallet? Fresh pain a while ago. I have that feeling na maraming importanteng bagay doon para sa akin. Memories and remembrance? Yung gospel and invitation na unang invite sa akin. Yung id’s, yung tickets. syempre yung allowance. Lahat lahat pati yung wallet na mahal :\, I too much value the things I have and the things that are given to me that’s why it cause me pain. Sunday morning when I lost my wallet. I dunno’ where I misplace it. All I know, that wallet is very important to me. Umaasa akong maibabalik siya. Til’ now, the pain. It won’t go away, today. But the reality too won’t change. It is a decision for me to completely forget what happened and convince myself that it never come back anymore. But I pray, kung sino man may hawak nung wallet na iyon. Lord, touch his/her heart. So I will wake up in the morning bearing the pain of reality because I am in the road of accepting. Wallet lang yun, hindi ko pagpapalit ang gladness ko.

The truth is, I will not blog about this, wallet thinggy-u know. I’m physically tired pero magalak ang aking puso sa pagkapanalo nitong intams. 3 days intrams was a great experience for me. First time ko mag-intrams sa AMA. And I received 3 champions (Table tennis – Single [Women] & Mixed Doubles, Badminton -Single[Women]) All glory belongs to God! One thing I realized, nanalo nga ako. But after all this thing, Inside my heart, may lungkot pa din. This coming saturday, may event sa church. Na dapat nakapaginvite ako instead of playing around, hitting that shuttlecock. Waking up early, doing stretching and waiting for the game. I feel guilt. I feel unsatisfied. I feel sad. Because I feel right now, that it was a wrong way. But, thanks be to God, for His mercy and grace. For He is a forgiving God!

Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man to whom the Lord does not impute iniquity, And in whose spirit there is no deceit. (Psalms 32:1-2, NIV)

Sa kabila ng lahat ng ito, saya sa pagkapanalo at lungkot sa biglang pagkawala, Still, PRAISE GOD! Maybe now, I’ll start another chapter. Move on. I am seeking always to have a start because I want to forget things I’ve done in a wrong way. But it is supposed to be like that? Forgetting what is behind and run like you had never carried faults in your life?

Do we really need to forget? Because at some point, sometimes, I see sweetness in pain. I see a charm in tears that have fallen. Looking back, thou’ it was a mess and unattractive, it is the reason I appreciate where I am and what I have today.

Mistakes, pains, and hardships are the ones we  mostly want to forget. But it is all the ones that  make us to keep going. We  keep trying harder, we keep fighting, we keep running, and we keep making things in proper order to rebuild things rightly. It  helps us to create our trace in this world. So that at the end of our lives we can say to ourselves, “My Life isn’t lifeless at all!” 

At the  end of  the  day I realize it is not about everything that happened. It is about the time I am always looking at. I am still that girl who thinks that time is always running out. I still put comfort in fast-paced and never want to see things slowly or in its regularity. Still, every time I fell to the ground, & every time I fail, still God’s mercy remains. Failure and success are both the possible endings of every season in my life.

In failure, I truly learn my weaknesses and things I cannot do next time. In success, I learn my strengths, the things I can and qualities I have that I can use again. And in both, I experience the mercy, grace and love of God. It is like learning the advantages and disadvantages of things around me.

What matters for me is the journey and not the ending. Endings are just bonus where I can say “Yeheyyyy! Finally, tapos na.” or “Wow! It is awesome! I want to do it again!” And in every journey I am in naman there’s only one thing that is always being point up. It is GOD IS IN ME, GOD IS WITH ME & GOD IS FOR ME and there’s always a next chapter with Him. I was lost for a week but now I am found again. More grace more love.

When do I ever learn? I am always like this and makes me forget to enjoy things  at a time. I am greedy to have it all at once not realizing that one present a day is equal to unceasing happiness than getting and unwrapping the gifts at  one once and not having anything tomorrow. 

I know that I have to go back. I do not know where to find what I am losing because I don’t also know what specifically I have lost. But if there’s one thing I am sure of right now, it is the want to write the way I used to. To find the softness again. To go back.

Balik laban!

Life is a battle and a race. A battle with God’s enemy and a race where winner does not mean you are the fastest but the strongest and the one who really perseveres. Because the race I am talking about is not just an ordinary one, it is a race where  you are risking it all for your faith.

Right now, I feel better. I find comfort because of- JESUS ♥

My Prayer:

Remember your word to your servant, in which you have made me hope. This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life. The insolent utterly deride me, but I do not turn away from your law. (Psalms 118:49-51, ESV)

I will not give up. Because You trust me in this. You want me in this. Paul found joy in suffering, I should have too. Because we both have You. In this moment where I gave up myself planning for my future, I can only say Your Name and nothing more. Lord, your grace is sufficient in my weakness.

Wear your confidence!

WEAR YOUR CONFIDENCE! (AMA Mr. & Ms. Freshmen 2014)

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Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised. (Hebrews 10:35-36 ESV)

Never in my dreams would I have thought about joining a pageant or any contest related to beauty or what. No wait, scratch that off. Never in my dreams would I even imagine myself ramping at the stage in front of many people. like woah. I was not like the other young pretty girls stands in their won sash and tiara in their room. And yeah, I was blessed to walk across the stage wearing this CONFIDENCE that came from God.

Speaking of CONFIDENCE. That was the question on Q & A Portion. (An unexpected Q&A Portion)

How will you compare your confidence compare to other contestants?

Hahaha. Sorry I don’t even remember the answer that I said. I just said whats in my heart and mind. lol, I don’t even know what I’m saying in front of many people. <like woah. do I look embarrassing?> But I remember a lil’bit of it. I said – I can say that I have more confidence than the other contestants because I already ask God for a Confidence & for wisdom. I already catch the confidence to face in front of all of you. And blah blah blah.

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The first thing that comes in my mind is I think God has a purpose why He let me to join with this. At the very first place, I don’t really want to join at Mr. & Ms. Freshmen 2014. But I have no choice; my classmates already listed down my name. And I was like Me? Me? Me? Ayaw ayaw ayaw! I was so self-pity that time, I was thinkin’ that I’m not beautiful. I’m chubby. I don’t want to wear dresses. I don’t want make-ups. I can’t walk like a real model. I’m not good in proper posture. I don’t want those things. Because I know I’m not really called for that. Ever since, I don’t join any competition like that. But when Sir Sibayan already push me to join in. I was OK. Let’s try! I know God will never let me down. He will never put me in this competition just to have fun like wala lang. I know He has a purpose.

And definitely yes, I realize that because of that it allows me to boost up my self-confidence. Honestly, sometimes I don’t have a confidence. It helps me a lot all within a competitive atmosphere. That was the struggle that I’ve been experiencing right now, and that’s why God really use that Mr. & Ms. Freshmen 2014 to make me realize that Confidence is very important. I realize it when I’m about to answer at Q & A portion. I was able to handle the blow on my confidence and self-esteem. My mind said “I’m the daughter of God, then I’m beautiful and I’m intelligent” Kaya ko to! That’s why I hit that Q&A portion with full of confidence. Oha oha oha!

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Participating in this and having a strong self-image can often go hand in hand. It’s a wonderful experience. I think the very best part about my Mr. & Ms. Freshmen experience so far is that it has given me a chance to be heard on something that is very important to me. And that is my GOD. (When I’m about to answer at Q&A portion) I was able to tell everyone that my God is the one who gives me confidence! “SI Lord lang po yung tangi kong maipagmamalaki sa inyo”

Everything you do, DO IT ALL FOR THE GLORY OF GOD! I believe that everything happens a while ago is because of His mercy and goodness in my life. For all the skills, talents, wisdoms, strengths, knowledge and yea confidence is come from our King of all kings. Praise God for that!

So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:ESV)

The right winner wins at the right time”. That was the first time I joined a competition like that but I won. It’s really a wonderful feeling. I was not that expecting much. But early in the morning I do my devotion. And I was about to pray to God to help me. And when we already ramp I was praying na ‘Lord, wag po sana ko madapa’ hahahaha. Isn’t funny? And grabe, so init talaga. And the crowd was about to shout-out their bets. After doing that ramp and Q&A portion. It’s time for awarding. While calling the other winners. I was like ohw, mukhang waley ako ah. Hehehe, After announcing the 2nd runner up and 1st runner up, last na, champion. Mr. Freshmen 2014 – #9 oh oh oh oh. Si Jef yun ah. Last na talaga. I was about to pray; Lord, Lord, Lord, favor favor favor. Tuuugdugtuuugduuuug. Ms. Freshmen 2014 – #9 Woaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Like woaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Me? Me? Seriously? Until I got on stage I was still shocked. Woooooooooah grabe! The crowd was shouting phelpsi, baby phelps. Wawahhh! Hahahaha. And while walking upstairs, I was shouting THANK YOU LORD! And after getting my sash and prize, I was shouting GLORY TO GOD. Expect the unexpected. Grabe! How I could I imagine that? I’m such a blessed girl here :”>

God was the one who brought me in this kind of competition to honor Him and to glorify Him in any way that He wanted and for that I want to give a Big Big Thank you to God. All praises, glory, honor and adoration to Him!! Para kay Lord to!!

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This pageant really got the gears in my mind turning and I began to think, “What really defines beauty?” Is it clothes from overrated retailers like Abercrombie & Fitch, Hollister, Candies, Folded and Hung or Forever 21? Is it faces trapped in a mask of unnatural make-up? Is it obtaining a body that resembles a beanpole?

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For me, No. It’s not. What honestly defines beauty is one’s personality. One’s attitude. One’s true self. One’s heart. PUSO BAGO MUKHA! Hehehe. Amazing pageant contestants are the one who put a smile on face, let out a laugh, and have a little fun. Because that is, and always will be, the definition true beauty. Speaking of putting a smile on your face hahaha, a while ago, I told jef “Sakit na ng panga ko tagal ngumiti” Hahaha. Just wear your big big smile girls. Wear a smile on your lips as often as you can, learn to smile, smile when you say hello to people, learn to find something to smile about, when you become conscious of this, it will be a surprise to you to find that there are more things to smile about than to frown about. A smile brightens up your day and makes someone else feel much better, you can never go wrong with a smile. For a true beauty queen, it’s not about the title, or the crown or attention; it’s about the experience. It’s about feeling beautiful and knowing even when you don’t win, you have never felt more beautiful than you did that night. It’s about making new friends, it’s about learning style, grace, poise and how to speak in front of people. In the end if nothing else, you take away from the experience a greater sense of self-worth and accomplishment. That is a pretty great prize.

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10422561_791071087591233_7932283463569086583_nNaturally I would have been beyond nervous, but much to my surprise.  And also very freeing to show them who am I. I was happy to present me — just the way I am, and just the way God made me. I am glad to have taken the experience. 

So much for now. Thank you, God. Thank you for the Grace. Thank you for those people who help me to make over <esp. Liriel Alferez> and for those who cheer me! Thanks CA! Thanks Vikings!

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You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you. (Song of Solomon 4:7 ESV)

Tiaras! Walk in with confidence!

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MATH-irap ba talaga o Pinapa-MATH-irap mo?

MATH-irap ba talaga o Pinapa-MATH-irap mo?

MATHirap

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Bakit ko ba kailangan mag-aral sa Math? Pag ba magtratrabaho na ko, kailangan ko pa sukatin ang mga angle angle sa bawat gagawin ko? magpapatayo ba ako ng mansyon na ang area ay equal sa seventh root of xy minus x cubed plus 4y squared x over 2sin30cos60 plus ln 350 raised to infinity! o kailangan ko pa isimplify lahat? blah blah blah. sayang naman ang oras, pawis, utak, pati na tinta ng ballpen ko (eh lalo na pag g-tec 0.4 at frixion pa ballpen mo, bawat sulat kaya nun mahal haha)? Bakit ba importante malaman ang equal ng (x+y)2 at ang (x2+y2) Kaya minsan kapag hindi na kaya, sisisihin mo yung mga nag-imbento ng Math. Hahaha Sino ba kasi nag-imbento nito?! Gagamitin ba natin to kapag bibili tayo sa palengke x+y?

Matindi na ang isang given sa Math kung saan pinagsama-sama na lahat ng mahirap sa mundong ibabaw. Kawindang itechawa! May fraction na, may exponent na, may bracket na, may parentheses na, at may decimal ka pa! Tapos maloloka ka na kasi sabi unahin daw ang nasa bracket. Pero mas lalo kang mayayamot dahil may exponent pa pala at yun pala dapat ang unahin. Eh kala mo naman whole number yung katabi ng exponent at bracket, eh FRACTION pala yun. Ulit ka ulit. At umulit ka pa. At sige punit ng papel. At sigi bura.At sige pa. At halabira! Sige lang ulitin mo pa. Malapit ka na sa sagot.Kerubumbum mo yan!

Isa ka ba sa mga taong sumusumpa sa Math? Kahit ano bang pukpok sa ulo mo di mo makuha-kuha ang math equations? Ito ba yung subject na panira at epal sa mga grades mo at class card mo? Nakailang exam ka na sa Math pero di mo padin master no? Galit na galit ka din sa math no?

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Alam naman natin na tayong mga future programmer na ay Logic ang puhanan. Math ang pundasyon. Nganga ang di marunong. Hahahahahahaha. Pero syempre matutunan din natin yan mga karamay sa math, TIYAGA lang!

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Sabi ng mga estudyante madali lang naman daw ang College Algebra at ang College Trigonometry, + with matching sinister grin ng prof “Madali lang iyan class. Basic lang iyan, mga pinagaralan niyo lang yan nung High School kayo. kayang-kaya niyo yan” . Ako lang ba talaga alien na di makaintindi-intindi at hirap na hirap sa Math? MATHirap ba talaga o PinapaMATHirap ko lang. Let’s find out.

The true story why I hate math..

I was always a failure at math. Numbers never like me.

Nung elementary ako mahilig ako sa Math. mahilig akong sumali sa mga Math Quiz Bee’s basta Math-Mathsaya! pero nung start nung grade 5 ako. (sa pagkakaalam ko grade 5 ako non) humina ako sa Math. lalo na nung tumapak pa ko sa High School. Siguro dahil nawala talaga yung interest ko sa Math. lalo na nung High School ako ng naging mahina talaga ako sa Math at pakiramdam ko bumaba ang IQ ko gawa ng lagi akong hindi nakakatulog non (insomia kumbaga), laging puyat at palaging lumilipad ang utak ko. Medyo na overload din sa mga activities at di na natuunan ng pansin ang Math. Madami na akong advices na narinig mula sa mga taong matatalino sa math, mga kaibigan ko, teachers, mentor at syempre sa magulang ko. Pero madaming pagkakataon na nagiging self-pity ako. I have a deterioration of the brain (The results of physical brain deterioration can be dramatic. They include neurocognitive deficits, such as diminished attention span, verbal skills, spatial perception, deficits in abstract thinking and creativity, along with increased difficulty learning new tasks and retaining new information, flagging memory, and deteriorating sleep quality.) Pero ayokong i-declare. I know I am healed because God is my healer. at ayokong isipin na meron akong ganun. Nung wednesday, masyado akong emotional ng dahil sa Math. Oo, talagang iniiyakan ko ang Math since nung third year ako. Naiinis ako pag hindi ko makuha. Kahit na alam kong kaya ko. Kung kaya nga ng iba edi kaya ko din di ba? Pero pag nakikita ko na yung mga sasagutan ko sa Math nakakapanglumo at napanghihinaaan talaga ko ng loob. Ewan ko ba. Last week (Friday) nagkaroon kami ng Quiz sa lahat ng subjects. at dalawa na doon ay Math subj. (College Algebra at College Trigonometry). sa English nakakuha ako ng 78 (Nagtanong pa ko sa prof. namin kung bakit ganun lang nakuha ko. tapos sabi niya mataas na daw yun. Hahaha, 0-base nga pala. pero may isang naka-100 samin. sayang naman kahit sa English kapos pa din -_- ) O tanongin niyo naman ako sa math kung ilan nakuha ko? Hindi ko natapos ang algebra ganun din ang trigo sobrang disappointed talaga ko sa abilidad ko sa Math last week. hindi ako maka-move on non for the whole week ng dahil sa mga di ko natapos sagutan. para bang wala talaga kong tinatago kahit unting galing sa Math. at talagang wala. Nung panahon iyon, naisip ko ngayon di na ko nagtataka kung bakit mahina ko sa mga entrance exams kung bakit hindi ako nakapasa sa mga pinagexam’an kong University. at kung bakit hindi talaga ko nadala sa Engineering. siguro nga. siguro nga. kung anu-ano ng pumasok sa utak ko. Siguro nga di talaga ko matalino sa Math. Sa trigo 55 lang nakuha ko. tapos sa algebra hindi samin sinabi pero dalawang Test ang di ko nasagutan. Yung Test B at yung last part na prove. nasagutan ko yung unang Test pero nagkabali-baliktad yung na multiply ko. Sobrang baba ng mga nakuha ko. Wala naman akong dapat sisihin kundi ang sarili ko. Tapos nung wednesday, hindi na kinaya ng sarili kong umiyak. Nagkaroon kami ng grouping sa College Trigonometry. may ibibigay na sasagutan si Sir sa board. at kailangan naming masagutan syempre.. Eh may +20pts. kasi sa Prelims. Ako lang ata ang kinakabahan sa lahat ng magkakaklase. Gustong-gusto ko maperfect. Samantalang yung iba kong classmate lalo na yung mga matatalino sa Math sobrang chill lang sila samantalang ako, sobrang kabamuch talaga hahaha. Breathe & take a break! Nananalangin na kong masagutan ko talaga lahat. Syempre ayoko din kasing ma-disappoint yung mga kagrupo ko sakin. kumbaga kung di ko aayusin pati sila walang +20pts. sa exam, lalo na’t inaasahan pa naman nila ko. naku. Sabi pa ni Patrick Non, kayang kaya na ni Sheim yan. Sa isip ko, hala ako? paano na to? hindi ako magaling sa Math. tapos yung chukchakchenes na .11 na sinasagutan namin Math Error pa sabay Syntax Error. Salamat ha. hmp. Sobrang mabagal ako magsagot. Matagal mag function ang utak ko gawa ng deterioration of the brain ko. here we go again, flagging memory. Hinati ko kami sa dalawang grupo sa number 2 kami nina Patrick Non, at yung isa namin bagong kaklase ang nagsagot. at yung number 1 sina Bien Simeon, at Amiel Lopez at the rest na mga natira. Naprepressure na ko ng marinig kong +20pts. ang ibang grupo. habang kami madaling madali na matapos. natapos namin yung number 2. yung number 1 naman di nasagutan nina Bien. at hindi pa namin napansin na may number 3. Kahit +1 point man lang wala kaming plus (+) kahit pinilit ko pa si Sir na +5pts. man lang kasi tama naman yung number 2, wala pa rin. Ayun nung lumabas na mga classmates ko pinipilit kong di lumuha pero di napigilang pumatak mga luha ko. May phobia na ata ako sa Math dati pa. Dati ko pa naman iniiyakan yung Math. kaya nagflashback na lang lahat ng mga kahinaan ko sa Math. Hindi ako umiyak ng dahil di kami nakakuha ng +20pts. naging self pity lang talaga ko na ang pakiramdam ko ang hina hina ko sa Math. nakakainis. Mahal ko ang Math pero bakit hindi ako mahal ng Math :'(((( Pinipilit ko magaral sa Math kaso mukhang ayaw talaga sakin ng Math. Akala pa nina Amiel galit ako sa kanila dahil di nila natapos yung binigay kong sasagutan nila pero hindi, sinisisi ko talaga yung sarili ko na napakabagal ko magsagot. At pati sila nadamay kasi di ako magaling sa Math. Lagi na lang ako nahihirapan pag time pressure. katulad nung quiz namin sa Math nung lastweek (friday) nakikita ko yung katabi ko na nasa Test B na habang ako number 2 pa lang sa Test A. huhuhuhu. Dahil may papasok sa Room 203 ayoko namang may makakita saking naiyak. Tumakbo ako ng C.R ng umiiyak at nakatungo. doon ko binuhos lahat. Nagpapacomfort lang ako kay Lord hanggang sa canteen at hindi ako kumaen nakinig lang ako ng Worship Songs. tapos umakyat ng Library ganun pa din nakatungo at nagpapacomfort kay Lord. hanggang sa lumabas ako ng library pumunta ko dun sa likod ng library kung saan maganda yung view at mas nakakarefresh ang hangin. Nagkwento lang ako kay Andrea at kinomfort niya ko. Maya-maya pumunta na kaming room. tapos tulala lang ako ng bigla kong sabihan ng classmate ni kuya na si kuya tobi na umiiyak daw ako. kaya pumunta muna kong canteen bumili ng milo. Salamat din Liriel Alvarez at Mariella Mercado sa pag-comfort. Tapos nun pagkabalik ko sa classroom nagisip-isip ako. na kung palagi lang ba kong magiging self pity at iisipin ko na di ko kaya may manyayari ba sakin? Oo nga no. Pagtapos akong i-comfort ni Lord agad-agad naman niya ko binigyan ng wisdom. Na kaya ko to! Matututo din ako kailangan ko lang mag-aral ng mabuti sa Math. Kung sana pala high school pa lang inintindi ko na yung mga tinuro sa algebra at trigo, kung sana nagkainterest na ko sa Math una palang at kung sana di ko pinaeasy easy di sana di ako nahihirapan ng ganto. Kung sana lang talaga. narealize ko na malaking pundasyon din pala ang pagaaral nung high school. Nakakapangsisi pero alam kong di pa huli ang lahat.

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Para sayo ano ba ang Math at Paano ba mapapadaling intindihin ang Math? (Let’s hear it from the math experts):

Math? Just like a life with one problem and answer. Paano mapapadali? Do the basics. In short kung san ka mas comfortable yun ang gawin mo. Pinaka madali, nood ng youtube regarding problems.

Engr. Jethan Jeff Dulay

Ang math para sakin? yun yung para siyang word puzzles. Maiintindihan mo lang ung math kung aalamin mo kung anu ano yung basics. Madali yan kapag master mo yung mga basic math.

– Engr. Jeff Dreo

Math is all about calculation and solutions that you will encounter in our daily life. How to make it easy? I think you’ll just analyze it deeply and learn to be patient to all the calculation until you get the answer.

Engr. Ralph Madronero

Ang math pala for me, Hindi lang sya consist of numbers, variables etc. It’s more on being persistent to analyze and solve problems. Yung hindi mo, basta basta sinusukuan until you know how you come up with that answer. Gumamit ng code switching, kasi not everyone can understand English very well, tapos good approach ng professor as students if there are questions, para may interaction at the same time, natatanong ng students yung prof. sa mga Hindi nila naintindihan .

Engr. Elcia Marata

Math makes people cry But if you learn it, it will make you smile.  Math is fun if you know how to solve, Math is boring if you don’t know how to. The best way to understand it easily is by practicing it always.

Engr. Lyndon Libed

Ang Math para sa akin, isa siyang “Discipline” kasi dito mo masusukat kung gaano ka katiyaga sa isang bagay. Kung sa mga simple problems eh wala ka ng tiyagang palabasin ang sagot sa bawat problema what more sa totoong problema edi wala ka na ding tiyaga. Paano mapapadali ang Math? Simple lang. Mag practice ka mag solve. Kung hindi mo kaya mag isa mag solve magpaturo sa Math Prof. At ang pag aaral ng math hindi kung kelan mo lang gusto. Dapat inaaraw araw yan kahit 1.5 hours per day.

Engr. Patrick Mosquera

Ang math ay isang subject na iba sa lahat . Ang math ay isang skill na hindi masyadong kailangang mag memorize . Um mapapadali ang math kung uumpisahan muna sa basic hangang sa mas matataas na level nito .

Cedrick Untalan

Math ?? Yun yung subject na kailangan ng matinding pagiisip concentration.. It’s all about numbers kaya kung minsan masakit sa ulo pero once na naintindihan mo na ung buong subject magiging madali lng to. Para namann mabilis lng maintindihan tong subject na to.. walang madaling way actually you need to study it.. tas magfocus ang seryosohin dapat hindi ung ginagawang joke lng.. karamihan kasi sa mga estudyante ngayon porket alam nilang mhirap yung math di na nila iniintindi kc alam nilang di nila kaya w/c is wrong.. kung iintindihin lng nila mas magiging madali yun.

– Ricky Berug

Math ay pag-aaral tungkol sa paano mo masosolve ang isang problem kahit anong problem, basta isipin mo lang na para ka lang nag-aaral ng iba pang mga subject.

– Kyle Avedaña

Para saken yung math, nakakatakot. Pero nakakaenjoy. HAHAHA mas magiging madali siya intindihin kung magaling yung nagpapaintindi sayo.

Angela Cruz

Math is very complex but it can be easy by enjoying it and applying it on your personal life.

Samantha Sarcia

You need to love it. because if you don’t love it how can you understand what is math. Kailangan talaga mahal mo ang isang bagay para mas madali.

– Arnold Bartolini

Medyo drama to pati malalim. ‘Yung math po para saken, para siyang isang little “challenges”. Kumbaga sa buhay, parang eto ‘yung kung papano gawin ang isang sirang tv, magsaulo ng mga ganto at ganyan, kung paano ka matututong magswimming. Syempre mahihirapan ka sa umpisa, yung feeling mo sa sobrang hirap, susuko ka na. Pero kahit ganon, kahit alam mong mahirap, nakakaenjoy pa din. ‘Yung tipong, curious ka kung ano yung result na makukuha pagkatapos ng mga effort mo. Wala naman nakakapagpadali sa Math. Actually hindi siya ganon kahirap (wala sa pagmamayabang ha. :P), kailangan mo lang magenjoy sa ginagawa mo. Make Math your passion lang.

John Rey Tungul

Math is interdependent with science.. Math helps us understand science, science improves math. 

Melchor Ortaleza

Math, parang life. May kulang, may nawawala, may problem, pero at the end… nahahanap, nakikita kasi may formula, and theres always solutions in every problem… And syempre may specific formula sa bawat problems. Hindi mo masasagutan ng tama kapag ang solution mo palang mali na.

– Renato Alba

Masasabe ko lng sa lahat ng di nakakaappreciate sa math eh sila yung hndi alam kung para san ba talaga ang math.

Jefrey Silang

Kung hindi mo kaya ngayon, hindi ibig sabihin hindi mo na kaya habang buhay. Mahirap pero kakayanin kung hindi mo susukuan.

Tyrone Jasper Reodica

Tips sa Math from ememalberts (http://memealberts.wordpress.com/tag/help-in-math/)

1. HUWAG MONG ISIPING MAHIRAP ANG MATH. Ang nangyayari kasi, wala pa yung problem iniisip mong mahirap kaya inaabsorb ng utak mo at buong katawan mo, ang nangyayari tuloy nagiging close minded ka at inaayawan mo na yung lesson. Puro ka nalang “ANG HIRAP! ANG HIRAP!”

2. Learn and MASTER the basics. Dapat mani nalang sayo mag-add, subtract, multiply at magdivide ng simpleng numbers. Sounds elementary huh? Pero believe me kasi kung hindi ka marunong sa basics, paano pa kaya yung komplikado(DUH!)? Tsaka yung operations of integers. Alam ko medyo masakit siya sa ulo pero kapag namaster mo na yung mga equation na may iba-ibang signs, magiging madali nalang yung iba pang problem.

3. Take down notes(especially yung mga example). Makinig ka sa klase. Sayang naman laway ng teacher kung hindi ka makikinig di ba? Wag mong idahilan sa akin na hindi mo maintindihan. Kung willing kang umintindi, magegets at magegets mo yan. Huwag kang mahiya magtanong. Hindi naman porket nagtanong ka eh indication nun na mahina ka, ibig sabihin lang nun willing kang matuto.

4. Siyempre hindi lang practice. CONSTANT PRACTICE. Kapag alam mong hindi mo gaano nagets yung lesson, aralin mo notes mo. Pag-aralan mo yung diniscuss tapos magpractice ka. Kuha ka ng papel, kunin mo yung problem(yung problem o question lang ha) tapos ilayo mo notebook mo sayo. Try mo kung kaya mo na ba siya isolve. Kung hindi pa, review mo ulit notes mo until makaya mo na. Sanayin mo sarili mo sa ganitong routine, sinasabi ko sayo TIYAGA LANG TALAGA.

5. As you go along the way with Math, mapapansin mo yung patterns ng Math. Pare-pareho lang naman kasi halos yung mga ginagawa sa Math(ex. basic operations) familiarize yourself with the patterns at magiging madali nalang ang mga bagay-bagay sayo.

6. Dahil mahihirap ang Math hw, siyempre kumokopya din pero make sure na magpapaturo ka dun sa kinopyahan mo. Kung hindi sa kinopyahan mo, dun sa marunong. Wag mahiyang magpaturo, kaklase man o teacher. Pero kung kaya mo na, ikaw na mismo gumawa ng assignment o homework mo. There’s no harm in trying.

7. Give time for Math. Para yang kasintahan, bigyan mo ng oras at gaganti sayo(in a good or bad way depende kung paano mo siya tinrato). Mahalin mo siya, mamahalin ka din niya.

8. Wag mo icompare ang sarili mo sa ibang tao pagdating sa Math. Ang issue ay ikaw, kung natutunan mo ba yung lesson at kung papasa ka ba? Mind yourself, not others. Kung magaling siya, eh di siya na. Kung ikaw hindi pa, eh di mag-aral at magpractice ka.

9. Hardwork, determination and commitment. Do I have to explain this?

10. Last resort na ito. Kung hindi mo talaga makuha, maghire ng tutor. O kaya kausapin ang isang kaibigan na magaling sa Math tapos sa kanya ka lagi magpaturo. Last thing nga pala, yung mga willing lang matuto ang tunay na natututo.

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Just like what Sir Anothony Sibayan said on our first day in class.

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“Simplify the complicated” at hindi “Complicate the simple.”

In most cases, liking math in the first place comes from being good at it, and if you’re good at it, you probably don’t need help learning math facts. How if I’m not good at it? 😦 For many of us, math is drudgery: doable, but requiring so much work and practice and intensity of focus that it becomes too much, and we turn off to it. “Math is hard for me” becomes, “I hate math,” and usually quite quickly. But now, I want to change my perspective when it comes to Math. I know I can do this. I know I’m better than this. Since Monday is our first prelim examination, I have to study hard either love it or hate it.

 Mahirap ang subject na ito, at mapapatingin ka sa langit para humingi ng gabay at para maintindihan mo yung lesson. Pero hanggang ngayon napapaisip pa din ako, bakit kaya may mga hinahanap na ‘x’ and y, bakit may slope, range, domain.. Yung mga ganun! Kawindang eh!

Sabi nga ng classmate ko nung quiz namin, MATH – It should be analyzing, understanding and learning how problems are being solve because not all the time you can still memorize those steps but if you learn how to solve those problems its easier for you to find any solution to that. Remember, its better to know how that happened than just memorizing the steps to make it happen.. Hahaha anyway. That’s only my opinion.

Totoo naman. Sha, tatalino din ako sa Math. Hahahaha. Ang anak ng Diyos, matalino! kailangan lang ng determinasyon, tiwala, willingnes, at tiyaga.

I can do all this through Him who gives me strength. – Philippians 4:13, NIV

photo-credit-deviantart-com

Faith without action is death.